Sign Language

You know, it’s funny. I believe that every sign is a sign from God; and I’m a literalist, so when I say “sign” I don’t mean something that happens in life that I interpret as a sign, I mean sign literally; actual physical signs like “Stop” “Do Not Enter!” and “Eat at Joe’s,” those kinds of signs.

Think about it. Everything belongs to God including each and every sign. If the signs belong to him, then the words the signs reflect are His Words. Those words are not random. They are part of God’s instructions uttered to us in reflective, neon and strobe-lit lettering.

Now as you might imagine this “One Way” of Life complicates things significantly as one remains obedient to the signs of God. I mean; signs from God have to be obeyed. I cannot delay in obeying them either. They must be obeyed – whenever possible – as soon as they are revealed unto me.

Remember though, that many signs, thankfully, are merely informative and don’t explicitly tell you to do something; for instance, Speed Limit: 70 mph. It’s only telling you what the limit is. It’s not telling you that you have to go the limit. Now whether you should or not is a different blog, but the sign doesn’t command you to do so.

One of the most important things is the gift of being able to discriminate between important or relevant signs and irrelevant signs. If you lack that insightful ability, it can appear that the world of divine revelation is just a quagmire of chaos and mixed messages.
So here are a few more general principles I use that help to simplify life:

Symbols: A Common Misconception:

Signs with symbols aren’t telling me to do anything. (What is that?!?! A guy with a detached head dropping snowballs with leaves inside them into a huge duck mouth?!?!? I don't have a clue! It has no words, therefore it can’t be telling me anything important. I mean get real! I am literate in ENGLISH not hieroglyphics!) Now, pay attention this is important: Symbols are too cryptic and therefore have no place in my religious system. God doesn’t say strange things. He is always succinct. Sure they are still his signs and have purpose, but you have to be reasonable. They are not for people. Who knows? Perhaps he communicates to the animals with the symbol signs. I don’t know. I just chalk that one up to mystery.


Here are a few examples that might help you get the idea:

· Wet Paint See that’s merely informative. I can touch the paint if I want to. Only if it said “Don’t Touch”, would I have to adhere to it.

· Drive in for a Car Wash! – My car isn’t even dirty, but I am a person of faith and cleanliness is next to godliness. In fact, the heavenly realm can probably see filth on my vehicle of which I am not even aware.

· Do Not Walk On Grass! – These kind can get tricky because does it mean, Do Not Walk on Grass Ever? Any Grass? Or just this grass right now? There are some gray areas, I guess I’d have to admit.

· No Diving! – Why would anyone dive into a dangerously shallow depth of water anyway?!?! You see; the Word of the Lord is ever faithful and prudent.

· Try it SuperSized! – Come to think of it, I am famished. He leads me to an affordable and stodgy meal before I am even fully aware of my gnawing hunger.

· Stop in and Try our Brisket! Dammit!!! I don’t even like Brisket! Besides, I just ate an entire Super-Sized McMeal!! I really struggle with all this some times; and I guess you could say that I’m a slightly on the obese side. For some reason it seems there are a lot of signs that tell me to eat this food or that. Clearly, God, in the mystery of His ways, is providing me a safeguard against vanity.

· Cardiology Center – Again, good to know – informative – but I don’t have to do anything.

· Tailored Wedding Gowns. Call Now! – Now that’s just annoying. Admittedly, I don’t get it, but I call anyway on a leap of faith. I am thankful that the sign doesn’t command me to purchase the garment, but simply instructs me to call. Usually, I just call and pretend I want to order a pizza and they think I have the wrong number; so I can check that one off as: “OBEYED”.

· For Sale – So? Everything’s for sale if the price is right, can I get an “Amen”? I kid, but again, this sign isn’t commanding me to do anything and I’m like, totally down with that.

· Enjoy Coca-Cola! - Thankfully, I adore Coca-Cola; otherwise how would I genuinely enjoy it? I suppose if someone who doesn’t like the drink was to make an honest attempt at obedience, God would intervene and supernaturally enable them to enjoy the wonderfully sweet effervescent beverage. And I suspect that their aversion to the glorious product is somehow rooted in a spiritual poverty anyway.

· Now, some signs prophesy about the future. I don’t have to do what they say because I take it on faith that it will happen weather I do it or not. I am talking about signs like “You’ll Love Our Oak Armoires”. Plus don’t forget that telling somebody that something will happen is not the same as actually telling them that they have to make it happen; thank God.

This assuring, yet intense system of faith can be overwhelming at times to my mere humanity and when I am feeling that way, I try really hard to look straight ahead and not focus on any signs. This is because, if I don’t see the sign, even if I know it’s there, I don’t have to obey it. It just wouldn’t make sense otherwise. They are only signs from God in a particular time and to a particular person. Otherwise, I’d be trying to obey every sign that I knew existed somewhere; and that’s just ridiculous.

Usually, however, I eventually become dreadfully curious and can’t help but look at a sign even if I suspect it may be a terrible inconvenience. I guess this is because of my relentlessly insatiable hunger for more and more spiritual depth. This is simply the way I am. It could be simply because I am a Virgo, but the more important question is, “What’s your sign?”